“The Biggest Loser” is a television program aired in many countries in which contestants compete for a cash prize and the winner is the one who has lost the most amount of weight. There are versions in the US, UK, France, New Zealand and in many countries and the Australian version is about to start with a new series featuring families.
As a trained intuitive profiler I don’t agree with all aspects of the program and the way that the contestants are sometimes manipulated, but I have been moved and shocked at the promotional advertisements on TV in Australia this week showing one woman who turns to one of the trainers after she’s walked off the set and says “I don’t want to change – there, I’ve said it!”
Now this lady is obese, and presumably she has serious health issues associated with this that affect her quality of life, but when forced to make a choice about changing what is comfortable, familiar and safe in her life, she is terrified.
Even if she doesn’t like the results of these comfortable, familiar and safe choices – which have led to her being obese and limiting what she can do in her life – she is more terrified of losing what these mean to her and what she knows than gaining the benefits of adding healthy living to her current existence.
This small piece of footage struck me so much because even now when people seek my advice, it surprises me how many people will argue as to why they should continue doing things the way they do and thinking the way they do – even though they are clearly not happy with their present situation and they have sought my advice as to their future if they continue to do what they are doing.
In asking what you can do to change your situation, you recognise that your current way of doing things is not working and this is a major step to making change, whether it involves your health, your finances, your career, your relationships, your mindset or any aspect of your life that affects they way you think and feel about yourself.
But the major challenge once you receive advice is to acknowledge whether you WANT to change and start acting on that advice. That involves seeing change as an addition to your life, not a loss or a fear; seeing it as something that you must do to realize your dreams or potential, rather than something you academically acknowledge would be good to do if other factors fell into place first or if you could be bothered.
We have all bought the self-help books, the relationship books, the diet books and the financial wizardry books telling us what we need to do; read them and then put them on our shelves. Why? Because we wanted a quick fix rather than real change.
Real change comes from wanting to add to your life rather than take from it. How? By adding time spent with your family doing something you love rather than spending so much time making money for someone else; by adding love into your life and appreciation for all the things that make you unique rather than spending time questioning yourself and wondering why you are always criticised; by adding your ideas and ability to help others into the world rather than wondering if you’d ever make a difference; by spending time walking and playing with family and friends rather than sitting on the couch.
Real change is about being the big winner in your life by embracing it, and not being the biggest loser when you live in fear and cling to what you know.